Pinko Magazine Hedonism + Activism

John Hagee, pastor at the San Antonio-based Cornerstone Church and President of Global Evangelism Television has built an entire empire out of saying bizarre and wildly offensive things about Jews, Catholics, Muslims, Palestinians and African Americans. He once even held a “slave auction” at his church. Despite all of this, he simply can not get his name in the paper.

The reason is that some blow hard from the windy city named Jeremiah Wright has been hogging all the ink. By now Wright, a decorated veteran and famously tolerant pastor has become the poster child for racial intolerance and extremism. That’s a pretty impressive accomplishment considering his most outrageous comments are bland compared to those uttered by wacko extremists like Martin Luther King Jr. So why is it that John Hagee is falling so far behind in the quest to be America’s Next Most Hateful Pastor? The answer is simple: poor media management. From Media Matters:

A Media Matters for America review found that since February 27, the date that televangelist John Hagee endorsed Sen. John McCain for president, The New York Times and The Washington Post combined have published more than 12 times as many articles mentioning Rev. Jeremiah Wright Jr. and Sen. Barack Obama as they have mentioning Hagee and McCain.

So John, if you’re reading this (and I know you are!) take a word from the wise and fire your publicist. With all the bizarre crap you say, you should have no problem dominating the news cycle. I know McCain has kinda sorta denounced you but that doesn’t matter! Obama has been forcefully denouncing Wright over and over again for months and it’s still magically a big story that the two of them know each other. It’s true that Rev. Wright has a long and involved history with Barack Obama, but considering how tirelessly John McCain pursued your endorsement, you have something even juicier!  Maybe a more capable publicist could help you with that.

About The Author - Stirling McLaughlin is an Art Director, Designer and Illustrator in New York City. Stirling enjoys vegan baking, expensive sportswear and mustard and relish sandwiches. Stirling lives in Manhattan with his wife and daughter. - Visit Stirling's site.